Tom Cruise

[Token Northern Boy (Tin) and Kiwi discuss strange things with Kiwi using a remarkably odd voice.]
Kiwi: Tom Cruise? TOM CRUISE?! Cats and boats do not get along. Therefore Tom and Cruise do not correlate, and Tom Cruise does not exist.
[Everyone laughs.]
Sarah: That is the best reasoning for Tom Cruise's disexistence ever. That HAS to go on the blog!


[Part of the enlarged Sixth-Floor Amoeba is watching that movie about an imprisoned innocent banker. In the scene, the prisoners are eating food from trays.]
Kiwi: Hey. It looks like Windsor food.
Lora: Yeah, but it looks a bit better.
Kiwi: Yeah. The beans look like beans.


Sarah: Come Christmastime, I'm going to have tinsel in my room. Only a few weeks before, when we're actually here.
Kiwi: Come that time, I'm going to be working my bum off.
Sarah: My room will have tinsel!
Kiwi: Well, I'll have to work my bum off in your room. Only then I won't have a posterior, only an anterior. How sad. I wonder how much weight I would lose without a bum.
Sarah: [Looks at Kiwi strangely.]
Kiwi: [Continues rambling.] A new weight-loss technique. Surgically remove your rear! See how much weight you lose!
Alisha and Matt: [Look over, confused, asking what's going on.]
Kiwi: [Breaks out in a fit of laughter.]
[Continues.]
[Can't breath but still continues.]
[Falls over hugging laptop, but continues laughing.]
Matt: [Says something.]
Kiwi: Iiii -- Haaaate -- Youuu! [All high-pitched and long, for she cannot breath in properly and her throat is all tight. Sounds like a deflating balloon.]
Kiwithoughts: I should have been a character in Mary Poppins...